WHERE ARE ALL THE CHUBBY GUYS?!?!?

I need to go eat out at some artisanal Burger place with a fat guy with a beard. The portion sizes are on the smaller size so he eats his in record time. I only eat the few bites and fries, so when he's done with his meal he asks if he can have my leftovers and I oblige. All is going according to plan. Stare at him transfixed as he obliterates that hamburger. After we get our desserts we head over to my place and I force this 120kg man to be my weighted pillow for the night. Come morning I'm serving him a litre of porridge with sides of kisses.

I need to go eat out at some artisanal Burger place with a fat guy with a beard. The portion sizes are on the smaller size so he eats his in record time. I only eat the few bites and fries, so when he's done with his meal he asks if he can have my leftovers and I oblige. All is going according to plan. Stare at him transfixed as he obliterates that hamburger. After we get our desserts we head over to my place and I force this 120kg man to be my weighted pillow for the night. Come morning I'm serving him a litre of porridge with sides of kisses.